Loading Quotes
From The Nameless Mod
Until patch 1.0.2, TNM displayed quotes from the development team (and certain fans) during the loading screens. In version 1.0.2, these quotes have been replaced with helpful hints about the game, but you can bring the quotes back by typing "quotes" during the credits.
List of quotes
Some people with faster machines have mentioned that it can be difficult to read the quotes, so here is a complete list of loading screen quotes:
- Aemer: Is your player sophisticated and literarily interested? Or is he the world's greatest "My Name is Earl"-fan?
- Beeblequix: Proposal: we scrap all the rest of our maps and just use this one for all of TNM.
- Chris the Cynic: Word complains when you use the passive voice. This is a problem as ass is kicked by the passive voice.
- Chris the Cynic: You forget that there is a middle ground between agree and disagree called, "indifferent." Again, this is easier if you're tired (or very young, or the President of the United States).
- DDL: Yeah, well my mod is gonna pwn you all. It'll be just like the original, only it'll also come with blackjack, and hookers... in fact, forget the mod.
- Dr. Dumb Lunatic: "It sort of goes Log: Ur gay Log: Ur gay etc for about five pages. Is this bad?"
- Dr. Dumb Lunatic: I haven't got a clue how to design or make an internal combustion engine, but if someone designed one that ran by burning kittens, I'd be perfectly entitled to criticise it.
- Dr. Dumb Lunatic: It's a bit crap, but I try to hide that by making it flash and spark and change its scaleglow a lot.
- Dr. Dumb Lunatic: JC's facial hair killed my entire family. Just so you know.
- Dr. Dumb Lunatic: There's a smiley for this: it's O_o
- Dr. Dumb Lunatic: You found: sword of Voice Acting +5!
- EER: In fact, if TNM is not released by the end of the month I will have forgotten I participate in it at all.
- Gelo: Before you go, let's talk trash about Jonas... oh wait, he's still here.
- Gelo: I should really try to work more like a cat... sleep 16 hours, stretch, lick my butt and then have my loved ones pet and feed me.
- Gelo: Pointman should be in your inbox.
- Hao Niu-rou: They'd think I'm a terrorist, at which point, since I'm living in Canada, they'd give me welfare or something.
- Henry: For "over the top", read: Louder.
- Iki: "TNM: Beats you, kicks you when you're down, and sleeps with your sister."
- Jim: How is "Trestkon" pronounced anyway? Friggin weirdo had to give himself the weirdest damn name ever.
- Jim: My head is being scratched. By my hand, in curiosity.
- Jonas: *Puts another notch on the "How many drinks do I owe OiNutter" list*
- Jonas: And it is the last fucking time I'm ever wearing mascara.
- Jonas: But I'm a professional! I have a whole year's experience in putting you on hold if you call.
- Jonas: By the way, if UEd had been programmed by competent people, TNM would've been done half a year ago.
- Jonas: Don't hesitate to temporarily block me when I begin to bore you, it's the only way to shut me up this time of night.
- Jonas: I googled "spider" in the image search engine, which as it turns out was a really bad idea for somebody with extreme arachnophobia.
- Jonas: I spent a lot of time cleaning up the mess Pointy had left in the voice acting department, but now Gelo's on it and he has a fucking spreadsheet, can't compete with that.
- Jonas: I wish our mappers were all unemployed and had nothing better to do than map all day.
- Jonas: It's not a BSP error though, it's just wonkyness with the way water works (check out that alliteration).
- Jonas: Just call it "Limited Edition" and sell it with the slogan "Get yours before Eidos shuts us down!"
- Jonas: Meh, when you have a girlfriend, all her hints pretty much mean "it's been a while since you bought me flowers..."
- Jonas: Nonlethal weaponry can be surprisingly lethal in combination with a gun.
- Jonas: Note for posterity: Do NOT rebuild code packages while installing Visual Studio.
- Jonas: Sometimes I look at our progress bars and I think "somebody please just blow up my PC".
- Jonas: The briefing for the OSC mission should now no longer make most players fall asleep.
- Jonas: The more I write, the more I love myself.
- Jonas: This is a great rack!
- Jonas: TNM runs on two engines: UT1.5 and GUILT!
- Jonas: What would be cool is if one computer had Burden of 80 Proof on it as an adventure game, and in Burden of 80 Proof, where you have to playtest that store owner's game, the game is instead TNM O_O
- Jonas: Wish I could pay people for their work on TNM so I could cut their salary when they slack.
- justanotherfan: And I vote that James T gets banned for posting poetry. Completely uncalled for.
- Kevo-sama: Yes, I know a few of the buildings are floating currently, but that's because the ground has yet to reach them.
- LeoBad: I'm the physical expression of the word exhausted.
- Metche: ...adding people to MSN is like collecting loyalty card points at sainsburys.
- Metche: I brandish a GEP gun that I keep in my garter - should ever the need arise.
- Metche: I don't flash for fun. Erm, Flash program that is.
- Metche: Serves me right for being female!
- NVShacker: "Whenever I'm feeling poisoned I just pull out my Marlboros."
- NVShacker: A good chunk of my profanities go towards engine code I don't have access to.
- NVShacker: Downtown is going to be littered with people with screwdriver stab wounds in their necks before I'm done.
- NVShacker: Give him 10 CCs of nagging, stat.
- NVShacker: I am not getting in a car with path finding designed by Unreal Engine people, I'll tell you that right now.
- NVShacker: I have a cat headrest. It's purring and possibly homicidal.
- NVShacker: I just saw a friend online who owes me big for doing his compsci coursework a few times, my kindness is now rewarded by the removal of the tedious puzzle conversion task.
- NVShacker: I see my spelling is bearing the brunt of the offensive brought on by my sleep deprivation.
- NVShacker: I wish I hadn't struck such a poor balance of esoteric knowledge (like programming) and common sense (like realizing TNMDeco4Trest.rar probably isn't for me).
- NVShacker: Perhaps we should change our name to A Mod That is Better Than Zodiac Albeit Completely Unrelated and Not Strictly Comparable and We Recommend You Play Both.
- NVShacker: RICEBAGS OF INEXPLICABLE UNCONSCIOUSNESS +3.
- NVShacker: This begs the question, could Jesus code a map editor so buggy he himself could not map in it?
- NVShacker: Throwing foons are some day-ruining shit on Realistic.
- NVShacker: TNM - its voice acting is 26,500% better than Oblivion's!
- NVShacker: Unless of course someone other than me did something POTW worthy (having consulted my ego, we find this unlikely).
- NVShacker: We need the modding equivalent of interns so I can send these Rush Hour puzzles to some hapless soul and tell him or her (at least I'm politically correct!) "have fun".
- OiNutter: Actually Jonas doesn't even know what TNM is. He has people who know that for him.
- OiNutter: Anyone with moderator access and Linux utilities could have done it as long as they had a name like OiNutter and were standing exactly where I was standing.
- OiNutter: I deny myself food and hygiene for TNM.
- OiNutter: I told Trestkon his username should be Larious... because whenever someone said hi to him it would be hilarious.
- OiNutter: I would rather kill myself than store data in txt files.
- OiNutter: If croutons aren't pleasurable I don't know what is.
- Phasmatis: Double post! I curse thee forums! For thou art crap!
- Phasmatis: I decided not to go with the bitchslap.
- Phasmatis: I would also like to point out that one... yes just one! Of the combine guards have more polies than the ATC map.
- Phasmatis: Oh yes I agree, I won't take all the credit... just most of it :P
- Phasmatis: Well yes, rejection makes you stronger... or bitter.
- Pointman: There's a place in Hell with your bindname, you know that, Jonas?
- Ryan: After you've read it, I want you to type, "I have read Trestkon's post and have given just short of a crap."
- Smike: My god, it is like talking to plastic wrap. No, really, I've done that. This is the conversation I had.
- Smoke39: The map resists pathing. I say let the AI find its OWN damn way around. D:<
- Steve Tack: I'm still looking for the "build map with no BSP errors" checkbox :)
- That Guy: Are either of you likely to catch fire?
- That Guy: But naked old people really piss me off.
- That Guy: Congratulations Jason you're President of Earth. Speak to your people. Try not to say anything stupid like cardboard = teh sexah.
- That Guy: Hopefully if I stand still, I wont break anything.
- That Guy: I had a bad crotch clawing experience when I was a child.
- That Guy: I'm going to save up all my big ass spiders just in case you do come.
- That Guy: It would be like if I was experimenting with a new piece of code which was supposed to make enemies crouch but instead formatted my C drive.
- That Guy: Jeez Phas, you're from England. You guys invented the language. Work it out.
- That Guy: Note that I have no idea what hard coded means, but damn if it doesn't sound cool.
- That Guy: Real life may have awesome graphics but the quests sure are monotonous.
- That Guy: That's going to be difficult. I'll get right on it :D
- That Guy: The AI is what us coders like to call "shit".
- That Guy: Time has not been kind to the width/height ratio of John Travolta's face...
- That Guy: Well it seems that if adding a cube to a map causes BSP errors, then adding a prefab that big is likely to cause seizures.
- That Guy: When I say hang on it's best that you continue talking to me so I don't forget you're there.
- Trestkon: After dozens and dozens of recompiles and code changes I am now insane.
- Trestkon: All TNM content feeds directly into my brain.
- Trestkon: First rule of TNM - Nobody can have the same MSN font colour!
- Trestkon: For some reason I'm in love with this brick wall. It's like "Booya! I'm a big-ass brick wall" and I'm like "yesir."
- Trestkon: Hacking a mod member's account and demanding files is like kicking over someone's game of monopoly and demanding all the money.
- Trestkon: I also make an effort to forget all my calculus to make room for tv show quotes.
- Trestkon: I really don't know why the DX fog sucks so much.
- Trestkon: If I knew what that meant, would I scream in terror? Or just yelp in mild agitation?
- Trestkon: If you need my opinion on something, just roll a dice. Higher numbers indicate higher levels of agreement with your opinion :P
- Trestkon: I'm coding the TNM uninstaller saved games funtionality, and I accidently programmed it to remove my DX save directory :P
- Trestkon: I'm like the good cop, Jonas is the bad cop :P
- Trestkon: It all comes down to the 8-ball on my desk. He's the real power behind this mod.
- Trestkon: It's like I'm a feeble old guy and Jonas is my trusty helper monkey.
- Trestkon: I've been hanging voice actors upside down by their ankles and shaking until recordings fall out of their pockets.
- Trestkon: So there's this drunk guy lying on the floor in PartyZone... and he randomly catches fire... what's up with that?
- Trestkon: Sorry, I was baking a cake.
- Trestkon: Thank you Mr. Advertiser. Please take my ban as a token of our appreciation.
- Trestkon: The time has come to talk of many things, of mission scripts and cabbages and kings.
- Trestkon: There's no way to have an open community if you restrict members to only posting about sunshine and lollipops.
- Trestkon: They deleted us because they claimed our entry was just for publicity... which it really was, but it still annoyed us.
- Trestkon: Watching the SVN download lines is like watching an ATM spit out free money, or Skittles fall from the sky.
- Trestkon: We have a lot of maps. We're crazy awesome.
- Trestkon: When I'm an engineer I'll build a bridge and name it "Jonas Sucks".
- Trestkon: Yes, I'm the worst leader ever.
- Vavrek: I haven't actually done anything regarding my lines. I'm sorry. I'll get to it sometime, I swear. FUCK! ASS! See?
- ZeroPresence: "Moving in to pet kitten, over." "10-4 covering your six."
- ZeroPresence: "ZeroPresence, you suck. You should just submit a 256x256x256 box and say you're done because you're a n00b."
- ZeroPresence: ...like "if you turn that corner, a scientist is gonna knock you out then put your head on a chicken" kind of evil...
- ZeroPresence: I had a crazy russian chasing me with a boomstick.
- ZeroPresence: I just walked up with my sword and started cutting down weeds and my sword got bloody and I felt like a man!
- ZeroPresence: The editor was like "ugh... it's ugh... it's ugh with... with a side of ugh!"
- ZeroPresence: TNM is working on about two years of forgetting its release date.
- ZeroPresence: To the map cave! Where I will map... a cave!
- ZeroPresence: Wait, did I send you pr0n named DXMP_Map by accident?
- ZeroPresence: WTF is jet setting? Do you set jets on the floor, then laugh as they rocket in random directions?
